The Prince’s Diary – 11th Entry

Saturday. This day I had to do so many things that I didn’t have the chance of doing during the week. You see, I like washing my own spaceship. I don’t like the slaves doing it because I don’t trust them at all. Besides, I like to see my spaceship’s outside frame carefully waxed and the interiors of the seats shining with Armor All. The vacumming of the carpets it’s also challenging.

These carpets tend to absorb sand and dirt and it’s very difficult for the vacuum cleaner to absorb all of it. I also put a new coconut smelling deodorizer. Mmmm. It’s a pleasure to fly now. After pimping my craft, I went to see if the slaves had finished my laundry, they had been careless keeping my clothes neat lately. If I’m not harassing or torturing them, they’ll get lazy in their chores.

It had been a hectic day, my body had been feeling the weight of all the work I had been doing all of the week. But Saturday came, and I still had too much work to do. So by the time the night came, I was trashed. But I kept fighting my slumber by getting into my computer and surfing the net. I had been reading emails, sex chatting with hot naked girls, plotting to continue my shipping war and making mayhem and chaos in Mafia Wars.

After all that, I still kept fighting my sleep and I wanted to watch some porn in my portable DVD. But before the first half of the movie had started, my eyes started to close. I just said to myself : “OK, I’ll just rest for awhile, then I’ll open up my eyes”. Then I didn’t remember well, what happened next.

The sound of my cell phone woke me up, I was completely disorientated. I forgot where I was, what time it was and hell, even who the fuck I was…I took the damn phone and screamed: Yeah! It was Cossack at the other side of the line, he sounded scared. “Sire!”

“Yeah, what the fuck you wake me for? You asshole!” was all I could scream.

“Didn’t you feel it sire?” Cossack sounded real nervous, but I was so mad…the only thing I could see was a girl being sandwiched by two guys in my LCD TV.

“No, I haven’t felt no shit! What the hell are you talking about?” I was still furious…

“Sire, there was an earthquake…just now..” Cossack said.

I kept silent and then I noticed there were some things scathered around the floor.  I didn’t notice before, even my paintings were all out of place.

All I could say was: “Cossack, are you hurt…are you bleeding…did you lose any extremity…?”

Cossack hesitated a little in his answer: “No sire…I’m ok…thanks for asking”

Then I said: “You don’t get it…you nit wit…I don’t care about you…. There was a little shaking and you panic like a girl…then you wake me up just to ask if I felt it? Asshole…you should’ve called only if the castle fell down…to see if I was alive…then you should’ve rescued me so I could choke you to death when I had the chance!”

“Yes, your highness! Anything else you need sire?” was Cossack’s immediate answer.

“That would be all Cossack!” I was shaking my head in disbelief. Then I hung up. Damn! What an idiot!


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